Mr. Surprise. That's what we tend to call him. We were surprised to be pregnant in the first place - that was never in our plans. We were surprised when I started feeling pains on the night of October 27, 2011, went to the hospital and overheard the triage nurse telling the on call doctor that I was going to be admitted and we were having the baby tonight. I wasn't due till December 3rd. To this day I'm still overwhelmingly surprised at how instantaneous and great my love was for Corbin the moment he was born. He took my breath away. I knew in that moment that I was meant to be a mommy.
The day he was born was one of the greatest days of my life. When we brought him home on November 8, 2011, I was so happy and excited to begin our lives at home as a family and watching him learn and grow. I would sit in the NICU for hours staring at him and holding him. I'd feed him and tell myself I'll hold you till the big hand gets to the 5. Ok, the 6. Ok, the 7. It would be almost to the 5 again before I'd finally put him back to bed. He loved to be swaddled but did not like his arms to be included in that swaddle. He hated his feeding tube and was constantly trying to pull it out. He got really close once. He was the most beautiful baby I'd ever seen. I know I'm biased but he was gorgeous.
I sang to him. I changed his diapey. I dressed him in adorable little clothes. I gave him baths. I fed him. I loved everything about him. I loved being a mommy. I know I will forever be Corbin's mommy but I miss doing all the "mommy things" I got to do for such a brief time. I just miss him so much and would give anything and everything I have to be able to have him here with us again. He's my heart. He's my love. He's forever my Corbin. Mommy loves you Mr. Peepers!
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